Becoming Our True Self

Gifford Volunteer Chaplain Kathy Rohloff shares her personal reflections in this blog post. Kathy and all of our volunteer chaplains offer a nonsectarian presence. If you need someone to listen, and hear you with compassion, you can reach them by calling the Rev. Tim Eberhardt at 802-728-2107.

By Kathy Rohloff

It seems that we are all struggling to be accepted, to be our true self.

We long to be authentic and have our inner thoughts, values, and feelings match our outer actions and behavior.

The way forward lies in self-reflection.

When we default to “that’s just who I am,” it leaves little room for change.

It is important to be authentic; it is also important to be kind.

One should not negate the other.

To be authentic, there are real behaviors that we can adopt, goals that we can strive to achieve. The following list may be helpful.

• 1. Words match deeds – we do what we say we will do and mean what we say.
• 2. No pretending – there is no false perfection or impressing of others in us.
• 3. Be vulnerable – when we don’t know something, we admit it and don’t try to be something we aren’t.
• 4. No people pleasing – we remain who we are and don’t change just to be liked.
• 5. Secure in our worth – material things or loud attention aren’t needed to bring us security.
• 6. Honest self-reflection – we admit flaws and work to overcome them.
• 7. Respect others’ boundaries –we accept others as they are without harsh judgment.
• 8. Consistent reactions – when encountering different situations, our mood and character remain the same.

Today and each day, we should strive to be the very best version of ourselves.

As Nelson Mandela said, “I am the master of my fate; I am the captain of my destiny.”

Or perhaps even simpler from Dr. Seuss, “Today you are you! That is truer than true! There is no one alive who is you-er than you.”

“You’re off to great places! Today is your day! Your mountain is waiting. So get on your way.”

Have a great day!